Tag Archives: woohoo

Oscar Contest Results-O-Rama!

Did you watch the Oscar awards on Sunday?  The whole show?  And you managed to stay awake?!  AMAZING!!  You deserve an award.  But too bad!  There’s only one award that we’re handing out today… the award for the 2nd Annual Cocky & Rude Oscar Contest!  This year’s winner correctly predicted 20 of the 24 Academy Award categories.  AND NOW … without further ado … (after all, why wait until the end of the post when the winner is someone who has never commented on C&R before?), the winner is: Bart Randall from Los Angeles, California!  Yippee!  Hurray!  Woohoo!!!  Congratulations!

Already in the mail and jetting its way to California is an assortment of seven movie theater-style candies, two packs of microwave popcorn and a brand new DVD of Lindsay Lohan in Walt Disney’s Herbie Fully Loaded!  Wow, what a great prize!

So how did I tabulate the results?  In a giant messy spreadsheet!  Check it out!

Here’s the full roundup of the results:

My favorite two category results were Best Cinematography and Best Actor in a Supporting Role.  Why, you ask?

It’s because 100% of the people that entered the 2nd Annual Cocky & Rude Oscar Contest chose the Best Cinematography winner incorrectly.  You’re all dummies!  (And so am I!)  In the Best Supporting Actor category, nearly everyone picked the correct winner (which was Christopher Plummer for Beginners) — EXCEPT Tam and Polt.  Ha!  They stink!  Lolz!

Each year we invite contest participants to predict the Best and Worst Dressed Academy Award celebrity attendee.  Since these categories are subjective, they do not count towards final scores.

This Year’s Best Dressed Predictions:

Meryl Streep, Viola Davis and Michelle Williams all tied for Best Dressed with three votes each.  Emma Stone was next with two votes, and then everyone else tied with one vote each.

This Year’s Worst Dressed Predictions:

Meryl Streep won Worst Dressed with three votes.  Glenn Close, Michelle Williams, Rooney Mara and Sacha Baron Cohen tied for second place with two votes each.  Everyone else tied with one vote each.

Congratulations to Meryl Streep and Michelle Williams for being our (predicted) Best AND Worst Dressed celebrities!  And Congratulations to Bart Randall for winning the 2nd Annual Cocky & Rude Oscar Contest! So what did you think of this year’s Oscar Awards?  Any surprises?  Who was the best & worst dressed of the night?  What did you think of Jennifer Lopez’s nip, Angelina Jolie’s emaciated leg, Billy Crystal’s break out from the old folks home, and the rest of Sunday night’s silliness?  Any thoughts for next year?  Who should host?  Do you even care about the Oscars?  Let’s discuss in the comments!!

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Have You Ever … On Thanksgiving?!

Woohoo, today is Thanksgiving!  Are you spending the day with your family?  Watching the parade?  Stuffing your face with dead animals?  Falling asleep early because you’re stoned out of your mind on tryptophan?  Need a break from all that crap?  Instead of a fourth slice of pumpkin pie, teat yourself to a Thanksgiving-themed Have You Ever?! quiz!  Yayyz!

The rules are simple: For each question that you answer ‘yes’ to, give yourself a single point. When you reach the end of the quiz, add up your points and post your total in the comments.

Have You Ever?!

1. Have you ever spent a Thanksgiving away from your family?
2. Have you ever celebrated Thanksgiving alone?
3. Have you ever attended the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade in New York City?
4. Have you ever sat through the entire Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade on television?
5. Have you ever watched football on Thanksgiving?
6. Have you ever come out of the closet to anyone during Thanksgiving dinner?
7. Have you ever cried on Thanksgiving?
8. Have you ever made your mom cry on Thanksgiving?
9. Have you ever been forced (or forced others) to recite what they’re grateful for?
10. Have you ever single-handedly cooked a Thanksgiving dinner?
11. Have you ever not eaten turkey on Thanksgiving?
12. Have you ever slid jellied cranberry sauce out of a can?
13. Have you ever dropped a dish while bringing it to the table OR while passing it around the table?
14. Have you ever needed to find an open supermarket on Thanksgiving because you (or someone else) forgot or messed something up?
15. Have you ever consumed at least two forkfuls of EVERY dish on the table?
16. Have you ever eaten an entire pie in one sitting?
17. Have you ever fallen asleep mid-Thanksgiving dinner due to a tryptophan overdose?
18. Have you ever ate so much on Thanksgiving that you felt sick?
19. Have you ever vomited after eating Thanksgiving dinner?
20. Have you ever clogged the toilet after taking a massive Thanksgiving dump?
21. Have you ever gotten drunk on Thanksgiving?
22. Have you ever gotten high on Thanksgiving?
23. Have you ever given a hand or blow job underneath the Thanksgiving table?
24. Have you ever received a hand or blow job underneath the Thanksgiving table?
25. Have you ever had sex (any kind) on Thanksgiving?

Well?  HAVE YOU?  Tell us your total in the comments.

Montreal Vacation: Part 2

Were you bored to shit after reading my Montreal Vacation: Part 1 post yesterday?  Then you’re crap outa luck!
Cuz here’s part 2.  Bam!  In the face!

Between Part 1 and Part 2, my arm grew back.  BUT NOT FOR LONG!  Because this paper tiger bit it the fuck off again.  Montreal was not a lucky place for arms, lemme tell ya.

Wondering where I managed to find a big paper tiger?  It was at the Montreal Botanical Gardens Chinese Lantern exhibit. This is the 19th edition of The Magic of Lanterns at the Chinese Garden. This year’s theme pays tribute to China’s first Emperor, Qin Shi Huangdi and his impressive cavalry.

The Chinese architecture is beeeeeeutiful!

This banzai tree (part of the banzai garden in the Japanese Garden) is 270 years old!
That’s almost twice as old as Polt!  Holy CRAP that’s old!

After the Botanical Gardens, Mr. Sombrero and I went to the Montreal Insectarium.
Here’s a photo of two beetles do’n it.

People eat that?  Eww! Gross!
… I was talking about the chocolate …
Cuz I’m an ultra vegetarian.  Right … I was talking about the chocolate.

The next day we took a day trip to Quebec City.  It’s a wonder we made it there, because I have no idea what the hell a white line next to a stop light means.

Old Quebec City is the only walled city in North America and is is the capital of the Canadian province of Quebec.

The city’s most famous landmark is the Château Frontenac, a hotel which dominates the skyline.

Here I am, standing in front of it and looking like a dumbass.

And here I am pretending that I’m looking at something exciting.

Here’s the two of us pretending that we’re cute.*

Here’s a sign that discourages Michael Jackson from tossing his baby over a ledge.

The next day we explored more of Montreal’s parks, tourist traps and strip clubs. Here’s a friendly white squirrel that I found at a La Fontaine Park.

Montreal is a very clean city — thanks to these amazing Gonzo-nosed golf cart vacuums.

Mr. Sombrero sampled some of the local artisan ice cream in a homemade cone.
Is this NOT the cutest photo you’ve EVER seen??

And then we went home to the boring United States of America.  Within 3 days, we both came down with upper respiratory infections.  Woohoo!

*We don’t actually have to pretend — we know that we’re cute.