Tag Archives: Baby

Happy Birthday Michelle M.!

Today is a very special day … it’s Michelle M.’s Birthday!
From all of your friends, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

A Limerick:

We all know her as Michelle M.
We think her to be quite the gem.
But I have been told
She’s getting quite old,
So it’s time to start calling her “ma’am.”

– Jere

Wishing you a mouth-watering birthday!
-David P.


Happy Birthday to one of my favorite people ever, Cooper’s mom and Wonder Women fan….
Michelle M.!!!! I hope you have the most awesome Birthday ever because you deserve it!!
– TJ and the doggies (Cooper’s Compadres)

Happy Birthday! From X-Heather and TwoPi

A Haiku About Michelle

The best in our books
Happy Birthday To Michelle
Hail Wonder Woman

– Kristen

Ode to Her Awesomeness
By Craig

What could one possibly say,
About the delectable Michelle M?
If she were a dessert,
She’d be la crème de la crème.

She lives in California,
All the way on the West Coast.
She’s the Cocky & Rude writer,
That us readers love the most.

She never met a head,
She couldn’t put on another body.
Don’t let her sweet looks fool you,
For her mouth is quite a potty.

With those flowing golden locks,
Like a superhero’s cape.
It begs that age old question,
Does the carpet match the drapes?

Her husband is a sexy beast,
Who likes pizza and canned beer.
There’s not a single gay around,
Who doesn’t wish that he was queer.

Wonder Woman is her idol,
And Cooper is her bird.
I don’t know who she loves most,
But Harry’s definitely in third.

So today is her birthday,
Hope she have lots of fun.
Happy Birthday Michelle M!
Congrats on turning twenty one!

Dear Michelle,
I heard it was your birthday so I wanted to send you a short note. I hope you have a wonderful day and that you don’t divorce your husband so you can marry a politician and then your ex marries a skinny little waif and then you can’t stop eating because you hate your life and you are fighting with your kids and your mother-in-law thinks you are useless and then you become the fattest woman in Westchester and then you can’t wear any of your clothes and then you feel so worried that you will eat up all your kids and then you will worry that Gene might be too small and gamey to be palatable and then your daughter hates you because you want to go skiing and she goes to her dad’s and get’s her period and then she comes back to you and whines and you are thinking “hurry up and have a baby so I can eat it.” Can I eat your cake?
Love, Fat Betty

From Mikey & Ty

Happy birthday to the most creative, talented, elfin proportioned person I know!
Happy Birthday Michelle!
Have a great day and best wishes for the coming year! -John

Ok, I know that Harry and Craiggers are gonna get real jealous here, but I got only one question for Michelle M.:

I Wonder Woman, are you my kinda woman?
Wit a back like that you fly like jets
Are you my Wonder Woman?

te quiero,
mr. sombrero

Happy Birthday Michelle M.!!! I decided to celebrate your birthday by mixing
my two favorite things: you, and my favorite albums!!! -Enrico




I Love Lucy, and Darlene, and Natalie, and Nellie, and Joan, etc., etc.

In case you didn’t know, I LOVE T.V. Here are some characters that have entertained me through the years.

Lucy, she was always coming up with those harebrained ideas and getting into trouble.
Lucille Ball was a comic genius.

Dr. Gregory House. He’s sarcastic, witty and smarter than everyone in the room.
I’m going to miss him when the season ends.

Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Who doesn’t love a bad boy? And one with an accent?

The Trio from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Warren, Andrew and Jonathan were the funniest,
nerdiest villains to terrorize Sunnydale.

Pat MacDougall (Amy’s Mom), as played by Georgia Engel on Everybody Loves Raymond.
Soft spoken Pat stole every scene she was in.

Darlene from Roseanne. Sarcastic and mouthy – but never bratty,
Darlene was my favorite of the Conner kids.

Joan Harris (née Holloway) from Mad Men. Joan is the voice of reason in the crazy world of
Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce. And she can rock a pen necklace like nobody’s business.

Stewie Gilligan Griffin from Family Guy. Funniest diabolical baby ever.

Bill McNeal from NewsRadio. Bill was a hilarious self-centered and pompous
doofus played by the late, great Phil Hartman.

Everyone knows I love Fat Betty (blam ba blam), so it should come as no surprise that I adore Fat Monica
from Friends. Fat Monica was so innocent, cheery and enthusiastic – and always a treat to watch.

Sue Sylvester from Glee. Though the writers have her go off the rails sometimes, I still love her.

Constance from American Horror Story. She is so very, very awful. But I loved it. Jessica Lange did a wonderful job portraying her – making her both nasty and sympathetic.

Natalie Green from Facts of Life. My favorite of the Eastland girls. Upbeat Natalie was always ready with a wisecrack. Too bad Natalie’s spinoff never came to be.

Dennis Finch from Just Shoot Me. Such a sarcastic little schemer. LOVED him.

Dewey from Malcolm in the Middle. Dewey was often lost in the shuffle. Because of this he had these weird little adventures that none of the family ever knew about. Some Dewey highlights for me were the episode with his pet fly Tony, and his dance with babysitter Bea Arthur.

Lafayette Reynolds from True Blood. Another scene stealer. He’s a gay, short-order cooking, drug dealing, road crewing, make-up wearing, butt kicking, fine black man. And I haven’t watched the last season yet, so who knows what else he’s been up to.

Nellie Olson from Little House on the Prairie. Nasty Nellie – Alison Arngrim made her so fun to watch!

Hiro Nakamura from Heroes. It was nice to see someone actually enthused about their super powers.

Veronica Mars. Whip smart, cute and funny. I miss Veronica and her sleuthing.

Wonder Woman, as played by Lynda Carter. Beautiful, strong and a great role model. WHERE IS HER MOVIE??!!

So who are your favorite television characters? Let me know in comments!

Adam Grrrrrrrr’s Too!

Stuff annoys me too.  Enjoy!

There’s not much that can distract me from Julia Roberts‘ giant mouth. One thing that can? Lily Collins‘ giant eyebrows in Mirror, Mirror.

I hate when people write the word that you’re trying to guess in Draw Something!!

And why the hell does it take so long for my Android Phone to load Draw Something? And why can’t I have the flashy loading screen that iPhone users get to see?

People at work that don’t know how to do their own job, and expect me to cover for them.

Movies like Tower Heist that pretend to be comedies. I DIDN’T LAUGH ONCE.

When I’m in a store and I can’t figure out how much something costs. Label the damn shelf!

Gas is so expensive! Grumble, grumble, grumble!!

People who don’t recycle!

Other things that bug me: People who throw trash on the floor of public restrooms, the fact that no matter how much I diet and exercise I can’t seem to lose any weight, I didn’t create (and then sell) Instagram, and people who won’t buy the stuff I’m selling on eBay.

Call me a whiny baby in the comments!

Ten Types of Burps

Happy Birthday Polt!

Friday is Polt’s birthday – so what better song to celebrate our favorite man who loves purple
than Kiss by Prince

You don’t have to be hetero

to turn me on

I just need your comments baby

From dusk ’til dawn

You don’t need experience

To turn me out

You just leave it all up to me

I’m gonna show you what it’s all about

You don’t have to be rich

To be my man

You don’t have to be cool

I’ll be your fan

Ain’t no particular sign I’m more compatible with

I just want your extra HUGS, cause you’re


You got to not talk dirty, baby

If you wanna impress me

You can’t be too flirty


I know how to undress me (Yeah)

I want to be your fantasy

Maybe you could be mine

You just leave it all up to me

We could have a good time

You don’t have to be rich

To be my boy

You don’t have to be cool

or suave or coy

Ain’t no particular sign I’m more compatible with

I just want your extra HUGS, cause you’re


Oh, I think I wanna dance
Gotta, Gotta

Little girl Michelle’s parade

Gotta, gotta, gotta

Men and not girls rule your world

I said they rule your world

Act your age


Not your shoe size

Maybe we could do the twirl

You don’t have to watch Dynasty

To have an attitude

You just leave it all up to me

My love will be your food


You don’t have to be rich

To be my guy

You don’t have to be cool

I think you’re fly

Ain’t no particular sign I’m more compatible with

I just want your extra HUGS, cause you’re


Happy Birthday Polt!

Have You Ever … On An Airplane?!

How are you celebrating National Aviation Week (August 15th – August 21st)? How about you buy me a plane ticket to somewhere exotic? You could include some spending money, plus a nice hotel room and all sorts of delicious gourmet vegan meals. Thanks!

But before I get too ahead of myself … let’s find out what you’ve done on an airplane. The rules are simple: For each question that you answer ‘yes’ to, give yourself a single point. When you reach the end of the quiz, add up your

points and post your total in the comments.

Have You Ever…

1. Have you ever ridden on an airplane?
2. Have you ever flown first class on an airplane?
3. Have you ever sneaked into first class on an airplane?
4. Have you ever been inside the cockpit on an airplane?
5. Have you ever piloted an airplane?
6. Have you ever flown over an ocean on an airplane?
7. Have you ever watched a movie on an airplane?
8. Have you ever consumed a meal on an airplane?
9. Have you ever gotten drunk on an airplane?
10. Have you ever thrown up on an airplane?
11. Have you ever fallen asleep on an airplane?
12. Have you ever had another passenger fall asleep on your shoulder?
13. Have you ever gone to the bathroom on an airplane?
14. Have you ever farted loudly on an airplane?
15. Have you ever been uncomfortable when an overweight passenger ‘overflowed’ into your seat?
16. Have you ever been driven crazy by a crying baby on an airplane?
17. Have you ever made a commotion on an airplane because you were afraid of flying?
18. Have you ever yelled at another passenger on an airplane?
19. Have you ever yelled at a flight attendant on an airplane?
20. Have you ever gotten in trouble on an airplane?
21. Have you ever flirted with a stranger on an airplane?
22. Have you ever had sex with someone you know on an airplane?
23. Have you ever had sex with a stranger on an airplane?
24. Have you ever been on an airplane that was overrun with snakes?
25. Have you ever been on an airplane that crashed?

In the comments, tell us your point total and (approximately) how many times that you’ve flown in your lifetime.

Baby. No Bath Water.

Five? Nah, one. I have one thing that tickled me to the point that I felt like sharing it with you this week. And yes it is a video. But this is no ordinary video. It is the product of adorableness and intelligence. The kind of video that results from hours of preparation and hours of hilarity. It also features a baby. Babies are the cure to all evils. I know this because I have seen this video. I don’t think there is more I can do to introduce this video without destroying the beauty and humor of it. So without further ado…I give you an interview with a one year old.

Now…I do not know that those are the exact words of that one year-old and I do not know that those are even close to the thoughts in his head, but I do know that I nearly died of laughter and tears the first time I saw it. Who can not see an infant interacting with an adult with that subtitling and not gasp for air?

That is all I had this week to discuss. Babies plus humor equals hours of laughter. I hope you agree.