The Awfullest Awful

I suspect that everyone knows at least one of these people.  There’s probably one in every family, if you look hard enough.  Some people shun them, others embrace them, most just try to ignore that they exist.  Most insist that it’s a choice, but I’ll contest that these people were just born that way.  They’re fans of (it’s hard for me to even type this)… They’re fans of COUNTRY MUSIC.

The twang, the redneck storytelling, the hats, the boots — I just don’t get it!  If you’re a fan of of Carrie Underwood, Travis Tritt, Vince Gill, Garth Brooks, Brad Paisley, Kenny Chesney, the Dixie Chicks, or any other country musician, then there’s just something wrong with you.  And Kieth Urban has to be the worst of the bunch:  he’s an Australian country singer!  Is that even allowed?

You can imagine my disgust when I arrived at a relative’s home today and found them watching CMT.  For those who have never ventured so high in the cable channel listings, CMT stands for Country Music Television.  And while I thought the television show, The Singing Bee, had died a swift death on NBC, I quickly realized my error.  The Singing Bee is alive and well on CMT.  It’s no longer hosted by everyone’s favorite *NSYNC-er.  (Justin Timberlake?  No.  Lance Bass?  No.  JC Chasez?  No.  Chris Kirkpatrick?  No.  Ohhh  Joey Fatone!  Yeah, that one.)  It’s now hosted by Melissa Peterman (that’s her in the photo) who previously starred in the sitcom, Reba.

The Singing Bee is basically a karaoke meets spelling bee-style competition where you need to fill in missing lyrics and complete songs to score points and eventually win.  Since it’s now on CMT, all the songs are country hits and all of the contestants are dirty backwoods rednecks.

My relative loved the show, and knew most of the lyrics.  I screamed along with the lyrics on the bottom of the screen in my best country twang and filled in the missing words with my best guesses (pickup truck, whiskey, flannel shirt, slept with my sister, inbreeding is fun, etc.)  It was truly awful.  At one point, I think I blacked out (fell asleep).  But in the end, we were all losers.


6 thoughts on “The Awfullest Awful”

  1. In general I am not a fan of country music*. There are a handful (and I do mean I could probably count them on one hand) of songs I do like. But I couldn’t name any at the moment.

    * This does not apply to Dolly Parton – who can do no wrong in my book. She is simply wonderful.

    And I think that country/line dancing is the awfullest awful.

  2. Like Michelle there are a few songs I enjoy, mostly what I supposed are considered cross-over songs that play on main-stream radio. I find the hardcore country a bit too much for me although that’s what I grew up with. Loretta Lynn and Hank Williams.

    And I’ve never had the opportunity to watch Singing Bee, nor do I plan to.

  3. I grew up listening to my father’s country music since he fancies himself to be a cowboy. It warped my perception of country music and its fans. I can not go down that road.

    I agree 100% with Michelle’s Dolly can do no wrong….she is awesome

  4. Hey Adam,

    Not going to disagree with you on the country music issue, as I too am not a fan (though not quite as strongly as you).

    I do want to tell you that Melissa Peterman is not only a great character actress, but she is a great stand up comedian. Melissa has produced an hour long standup special called “Am I The Only One?” and has just finished filming a TV pilot show tentatively titled, “Working Girl.”

    So, while she does host The Singing Bee (not on my TiVo recommendations) she is a wonderful actress and comedian.


    Steven Bloom

  5. I’ll give a more balanced comment than Enrico, but at the heart of his comment is some truth. There are a few songs that are good, though, there is an awful lot of crap out there too.

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